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Suggested improvements for the IPL

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These are some of my improvements for the IPL.

As every team seems to have one celebrity owner, why not do something more with them than just cut to them 83 times a match. At the interval they should have to fight each other to the death. Most of them are bollywood stars anyway, and there is plenty more where that came from.

Aamir Sohail and Greg Chappell should be allowed to do 5 minutes of stand up comedy before each game, to the death.

Since all the cheerleaders had to be flown in, why not replace them with actual porn stars, no need for flirty failed dancers. Just get porn stars in, they can be clothed, during the game.

The opening ceremony had laser shows, why not allow two young kids to have lasers during the game, and point them at however the feel the need to temporarily blind.

No matter what the score is, from the last over 19 runs is needed. That way we may get to combine the slogging with close finishes.

Every team should have one player who goes out on the field in traditional sikh clothing. Sword included, and if they deem it neccasary they can cut off the hand of a team mate who continually fields badly.

Players should be escorted out onto the ground with a lady on each arm.

The cheerleaders should be allowed to play, possibly instead of Ganguly.

Batting orders should be reversed at the discretion of the first drunken fan who is evicted. If none are evicted, the last person evicted from the MCG should make decisions.

Robert Mugabe should take over a team, and then take over the whole league and start killing the other celebrity owners, whilst starving the players.

Mascots should play a game against each other, to the death.

Finally we need some sort of spiritual aspect, lets get that young girl with the two faces down, and sit her in the middle of the ground during the break. And then let her bite the two players she hates the most.

That is my kind of league.
 
(Jarrod Kimber can also be found at www.cricketwithballs.com. Click here to know more about him)
(For more interesting things to do involving the IPL, try this)


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