Mr. Not quite cricket.

Written by Keith Miller

Wednesday, 21 November 2007

Cricket is a game for statisticians, and always has been. When a batsman goes out to the middle, or a bowler starts a spell we invariably get his career record displayed at the bottom of the screen.

Then there are the more esoteric records that get flashed up as a previously unthought-of milestone approaches; lowest NZ total in South Africa, highest score by a left-hander at the Gabba etc.. No other sport can do this; does anyone know who has scored the most goals in international football, or the most tries scored by a centre in either form of rugby?

There are some records that are rented. When Murali reaches 709 test wickets and overtakes Shane Warne tally later this year, he will become the 6th bowler to hold that particular title in the last 20 years.

But there are other records that are set in stone. New Zealand has the lowest test innings of all time (26) and Bradman has a test batting average of 99.94, almost 40 runs higher than his nearest challenger, which highlights just how great he was. They are learnt at a young age, and never change.

There has always been something neat and tidy about Bradman’s average of 99.94 and the story of his final unsuccessful test innings which contributes, rather than takes away from, the Bradman legend. Then daylight follows until a cluster of 3 batsmen between 60 and 61. Graeme Pollock is there, albeit with a limited test career, serving as a reminder that the world was deprived of witnessing what was likely to be the greatest test side of all time. Following him are two players from the Bradman era; the great batsmen George Headley and Herbert Sutcliffe.

In the late 50s are other greats of the game; Everton Weeks, Ken Barrington, Len Hutton, Jock Hobbs and Sir Garfield Sobers, mixed in with a couple of modern greats, Kallis and Ponting. For perspective, Tendulkar’s average is over 54, Lara is 52. Martin Crowe was 45.

So, until recently, it was everything in its right place. But that particular chart looks different now; as if a vandal has come along trying to spoil it for everybody, sitting on his own in second place now is MEK Hussey, with a scarcely believable average of 86.18.

When watching Hussey bat, you get the feeling that he is very privileged to even be playing in the same team as Ricky Ponting. For him to have such a superior average and be on the brink of statistical immortality is just plain wrong. After all, he didn’t even make his test debut until after he turned 30. Whereas Ponting exudes class and aesthetically exquisite shots, Michael Hussey fidgets and ferrets around the crease, squirting deflections square of the wicket for the bulk of his runs until he gets to 50. And even when he opens up after that and starts hitting the ball down the ground, it is never particularly memorable.

Even the fawning adulation heaped on “Mr. Cricket” by the increasingly nauseous Channel 9 commentary team fails to make him more than he is. It is worth noting that only 5 of his 17 tests have been played away form Australia, and 2 of them have been in Bangladesh. It also helps when you are consistently arriving at the crease with your team at 300/3 and the bowling attack tired. This has also contributed to the high number of Not Outs in his record, 6 in 27 innings. You get the feeling that Mr. Cricket loves his red-inkers.

And of course he has never had to face the best bowling attacking the world.

He has been around for a while though. Having now played 17 tests, and with 5 more tests at home this season his average will not come down quickly, if at all. This is not like Matthew Sinclair sitting on an average of 214 for a few months until McGrath and Lee came across the Tasman to sort him out, and forcing it drop like a rock.

So for at least another year, and perhaps up until the 2009 Ashes tour, this anomaly is likely to stay. But without wishing evil on anyone, I certainly hope this average does drop down to a level that is more in keeping with sporting justice. Cricket statistics are too beautiful to be skewed like this.

(Guest article, www.sportsfreak.co.nz)

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