| The Big @ss XI |
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| Written by Jarrod Kimber | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Monday, 28 January 2008 | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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The cricketing backside is something that not even the professionalism of the new game can damage. It goes back to Dr Grace, and it is more a part of cricket than the outswinger is. And easier to master.
But what is a cricketing backside, well its when a cricketer has a derrière than you can rest a TV dinner on. There are factions who believe that the cricket backside reduces skill level, but I think this blog may debunk this myth forever.
The other myth of the cricketing backside is that you need to be overweight, while that can be the case, some are very fit individuals who just have a little more cushion for the pushin. It affects middle order batsmen and wicket keepers mostly, however cricketers of all denominations can have rear bulk. New Zealand has always been the leaders in this category, Scott Sytris is their current man, but in recent history Chris Cairns and the Marshalls have all had great rear ends. After all it is the land of the large wide cloud. Even the most athletic and evil Cricket nation, South Africa, have had some of the great backseat wonders. Brian McMillan and Daryll Cullinan both had amazing back spaces. In their case, perhaps the backseat did affect their cricket, or maybe they were both just @ssholes. Australia has not been spared, Kaspa was the king, but Brett Lee has a larger derrier than is neccassacary and his brother Shane had a ripper. Some of you might be thinking at this stage, well maybe you white dudes just have big @sses, enough said. Not so my friend. While the cricketing backside is mostly a white problem, Sri Lanka, Pakistan (inzy anyone), India Kenya and Bermuda all have players with large derriers. Sri Lanka spent years being carried, not on the shoulders of, but on the buttocks of Jayasuriya and De Silva. If you see a young Sri Lankan who waddles, you know he’s gonna become a top player. Kenya may still be a second tier side, but in terms of bums, they are test match quality. Part of their selection policy seems to revolve around strong rear end muscles. I think its something they should continue, as success will surely follow. So here is my backside 11 from the last 15 years. Or my baby got back 11. 1.Sanath Jayasuriya 2.Steve Tikolo 3.Aravinda De Silva 4.Dayrll Cullinan 5.Craig McMillian 6.Brian McMillian 7.Ian Healy (lets be honest it could be most keepers) 8.Chris Cairns 9.Ramesh Powar 10.Brett Lee 11.Michael Kasprowicz 12.Shane Lee
(When not here Jarrod Kimber can also be found at www.cricketwithballs.com. Click here to know more about him)
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